For Now.

I sat down on Southend beach today and yesterday, and as I looked out to sea, I thought desperately of returning to the Philippines. I miss it so much. I miss the way the kids run up to me for a hug, and how the stars shine brightly in the night sky. I miss the way the sun comes up every morning at 5am, and merges gloriously back into the horizon at 5.30pm. I miss the way the people say good morning. I miss the smiles on the kids faces. I miss the feeling that what I was doing was actually making a difference. That I was part of something so great, so life changing.

And I thought of all the things here in Southend that are simular. Of the things that I'm involved with that maybe don't change lives as dramatically as building someone a house. But of the small things in life that really make a difference in someones life. And I guess, at some point in the future, I will return to the Philippines, and experience life out there once more. But for now, life is here. Home is here. And I have to make the best of that.

Accepting that doesn't make the heart ache any less, or the sinking feeling in my stomach any easier to bear, but it reminds me that life goes on. And life must continue, here and there, as it always has done. And if you see me anytime... I'd appreciate a hug.

Karaoke! Karajokey!

No trip to the Philippines would be complete without having a go at karaoke. When you are wandering in a mall, or in the streets of Manila, it is not uncommon to hear an ethereal sound of voices, from a distance, then, as you approach closer, you often wish you were walking in the opposite direction.

Many filipinos have very beautiful voices. Think Lea Salonga, for one. And our friends Lourdes and Jheneth in particular from Payatas sing beautifully. BUT. It seems to be a rule that those who enjoy karaoke do so because they may well not be allowed near a microphone under any other circusmtances!! There are karaoke bars in malls, and generally you see an enthusiastic singer at the microphone, and many others listening. I am never too sure whether they have nothing better to do or are patiently awaiting their turn, and hoping that if they sat and listened, others will do the same when they step up to the mike.

We were on our way back from Sipalay, and stopped at a roadside restaurant for the CR (essential term for anyone journeying in the Philippines), and sure enough, in a deserted restaurant, was a karaoke machine, and the owner or manager was belting out a song, to no-one in particular. Least said about it, the better, except to say that it was no surprise the restaurant was deserted and that we only stopped for a comfort break, not even a drink....

Still, when in Rome, as they say.... On the Thursday evening, having spent a very satisfying two days at Payatas at the build, we all went out for a meal, including the four young people we had invited back to the accommodation with us, as a treat. And afterwards, seven of us decided that the night was yet young, and we also wanted a beer (!) so we headed for the karaoke bar, perhaps to give the Philippines a taste of its own medicine, or to unleash our vocal talents on an unsuspecting neighbourhood. The bar was not packed. There were the seven of us, about four staff, the owner, as far as I could make out, and a drunk bloke. The beers were ordered, and dutch courage was produced, as one by one, we had our go. Josh first, with his tour de force version of Mustang Sally. I should add that part of the attraction is that these machines score the singer's performance, though I have never quite recovered from the shame of being beaten out of sight by one of Emma's daughters, who sang the same song as me, but out of tune, missing words out, etc, but LOUDLY. There is the key, I think. Because Josh sang it very well, very enthusiastically... But sadly, did not turn the microphone on, so did not register a score. Null points for Great Britain, though not for the first time....

After much persuasion, up I stepped to the mike. I even switched it on.... And sang "Yesterday" by the Beatles, with the distinct advantage that the backing was recognisable, as was my singing. Result, 94, and the machine's reassurance that I am well on my way to being a star.... I could relax now.

Up steps Ami, with Maroon 5's "She will be loved". I am not sure whether the machine got confused by gender issues, as it is a song which should be sung by a boy to a girl, or whether some of the last bit of the song was a bit different from the original which makes it hard to sing along. I am not going to recall her score - truth be told, I can't remember it, but it was lower than mine, haha.

Then Deb. She sang Fairground Attraction's "Perfect". Better known now for its use in a supermarket ad. It was a good effort, enthusiastically received by the "crowd" in the bar, but still not up to Jo's standard. Not quite perfect, according to the machine.

And then, Reg. Selecting that well known karaoke classic, Amazing Grace. Actually, that was one of many christian songs and hymns in the catalogue, reflecting the Philippines strong Christian ethic. Four verses later, delivered in a way which would have made our old choir mistress at church proud of Reg, and he too scored 94. Or was it 92? My desire to win the competition is not that great.... Anyway, a good job...

But we were saving the best till last. The combined forces of the UK and the Philippines. A literally show-stopping duet between Ian and some random Filipino bloke in the bar, who had been very appreciative of our efforts up till then. Sadly for Ian, random Filipino bloke chose the song, and Ian did not know it. Even more sadly, neither did the random filipino bloke. So we were treated to three minutes of karaoke komedy kaos!!! Much to everyone's amusement. Particularly when the bloke decided he really needed to get really close to Ian, to share the microphone. I forget the score, but it really was immaterial. This was one of the funniest moments of the trip. We laughed till tears were streaming down our faces. Maybe we needed the release of laughter, after what we had seen earlier, on Father Paul's tour.

Needless to say, that was an act impossible to follow. So Emma, our last representative, did not get the chance to demonstrate her vocal skills. Was she upset? I think not...

We made our way back to the accommodation, happy that we had shared in one of the Philippines' favourite social activities. And probably performed better than many a hapless British Eurovision entrant. Well, the machine scored us high...

The Payatas Youth Centre Build

After the shopping opportunities of Tuesday, Wednesday saw the team get back to the serious stuff. A build had been "organised" at the Youth Centre in Payatas. I say organised advisedly. Emma had been feeling a bit frustrated by a lack of communication re this part of the trip. Accommodation and drivers were fine, but a day or so before our arrivalin Manila, we really did not know for certain what would be happeneing. Hence the discussions with Father Paul and Mhel on the Tuesday.

This is the Philippines. The fluidity of arrangements is something you just have to get used to. But that is a two sided coin. This is the PHILIPPINES!!! And the flexibility and fluidity is something to be celebrated. I guess it is quite likely that if we were due to attend something or even arrange somethinmg in the UK, and plans did not fall into place, we may be inclined to cancel, or say let's do it some other time. Here, it seems that the willingness and flexibility of people to pull things together at the last minute is a real strength. Certainly, when we turned up at the Youth Centre on the Wednesday morning, there was no shortage of Youth for Christ young people to set to with the landscaping of the slope in front of the centre. There were plants in one of the halls, ready to be put in place once the "beds" had been designed. And later in the day, some materials arrived, to enable some concreting to be done.

All youth builds start with worship. Some singing, some prayers, and a real sense that God was in the midst of us. Some of the songs really made one think. I hope Alison won't mind me mentioning, but there was one particular song which we sang a couple of times which talked about giving our all to God, and we both remarked on the trust and faith people were demonstrating, and the joy, despite having relatively little in material terms.

The work was quite strenuous, though not as technically demanding as at Joyland. The team worked like troopers, shifitng a lot of earth, mixing cement, etc, and Alison, Ami and Ellie in particular have left their white mark on the third hall, having painted the walls with the longest roller pole I have ever seen!!! The second day, the girls and Reg got involved with the planting, and others got involved in laying the path, and it is wonderful to see the effect on the Youth Centre. Two really good days of working with the young people of the area, to help them continue to build a centre for young people to attend, learn at, etc. The hope is that more and more, it will become a place for the youth of the area to attend, get off the streets, put aside their problems with drugs, gang culture, etc, and find new hope. That is why, as a team, we decided late in the trip to donate some of the money raised to fund a sound system to be used atthe Centre, and a basketball net for the court which was started on the Crowe / Chapman, Randall team, back in October last year (it is wonderful to see the progress made, every visit).

More another time. I have got another plane to catch!!!!

Cause Every Song's Got Analyn In

Look down where those battered shoes lay
Ruined remains of a life, now rotting on the rubbish heap
They once ran down muddy paths
In and out of makeshift huts and houses
And now they lay, abandoned.
Tattered and torn.

Look down where that battered dress lay
Ruined remains of a life, now rotting on the rubbish heap
It once danced on a concrete platform
In and out of many laughing children
And now it lays, abandoned.
Tattered and torn.

Look down at where that body lay
Shameless excuse of life, on the rotting rubbish heap
She scavenged this place for something to sell
In and out of toxic rivers
And now she sleeps here, abandoned.
Hope tattered and torn.

Look down at the house where that baby lay
A new life, where poverty reigns
He will live and die in this place
Just like so many before him.
Innocent now, as he lays, new born.
In muddy rags, tattered and torn.

Ami Wager © 10th April 08

Reflections

I find reading Jo’s latest blog very challenging, it takes me back to the first day we were on Negros without any perception of what Joyland was but listening to Rick Sutcliffe preaching about being prepared for the spiritual battle we are in. Three day later, I could equate to exactly where he was coming from and the latest challenge alluded to in Jo’s blog only strengthens my conviction of how important the work of Joyland will be in the future. Please pray for the work there, I believe it can make such a difference.

Having been back in the UK now for a few days, I have had time to reflect and consider the impact of the last two weeks. Having left for the trip deliberately with no pre-conception or expectation, I return encouraged by how the four strands of work that we were involved in all seemed to come together and a clear vision of the future and how this interlinking will continue emerged.

Our objective for this trip was to make a difference, in this respect I believe the object has been fulfilled.

In Dacutan, the money given to the village will enable the sustenance of fishing to be maintained and enhanced, hence nutrition should increase and poverty ultimately decrease in time. The children have had leisure opportunities as a result of the visit.

The work of Joyland has already, and will in the future, relieve the social burden of families in the village and increase the educational opportunities for the children. The enhancement of the facilities there will add to the quality of life of the children.

The work of the Youth Centre in Payatas is growing and aims to change the culture and outlook of youth away from drugs and violence to “hope” through knowledge of Jesus Christ, a faith already displayed in the PYFC members that was very humbling.

There has already been a willingness of Payatas Youth For Christ volunteers to go to Negros and work with the youth of Dacutan, some of the surplus funds from this project will help support them in their work in the short term.

And finally, the ongoing commitment of Gawad Kalinga to improve housing stock in Dacutan and Payatas will all contribute towards making that difference count in the future. Our contribution to a Gawad Kalinga building project in Tatalon was purely manual labour, transporting sand and shale 500m from the road to the construction site, yet the interest and help we witnessed from the community that afternoon is what the charity is all about – I should add that we were also assisted by 20 Payatas YFC members, having worked with us on their own youth centre over the previous two days.

It has challenged me very much to look at how I perceive mission and the importance we collectively place upon it. It is very easy to get carried away with localised projects, but we must remember that as important these are, the wider overseas mission we are called to support is also important, and perhaps the time has come where overseas mission has to take a higher priority in all our church’s outlook.

I am grateful for the opportunity to serve in this way, the video I have posted below hopefully shows the difference our limited and small presence made to the external appearance of the centre, compared to the historic photo above.

Payatas Youth Centre

Something Extra.

Well, I've started the Avenue and the Philippines group on Facebook cause I thought it would be a good way of publicising this even more, plus everyone who joins the group can upload photos, I've put all mine on there of the Joyland kids, adorable. :)


We all came back from this trip with something extra. For some, it was a new found meaning in life, a new love for people living far away, for children, for others, it was new friends and new relationships with old aquaintances. Glen just came back with a hole in his head. (What a day...) Nah. It was seriously awesome.


However, went to the Doc's today, I have a mosquito bite on my leg thats been looking a bit dodgy and my legs been a bit achy these last few days, doctor took one look at it and put me on a course of anti-biotics. Its a bit awkward, going to have to try and keep it dry and remember to take the tablets an hour before I want to eat. Still, would I change anything about the trip? Not for the world.